Possibly the best game ever…

Posted: April 9, 2011 in Gaming, Video
Tags: , , , , , , ,

Nostalgia city. Population you.

Today I have discovered possibly the best game ever invented…

This is for all you 80’s kids that reminisce fondly about the days when you used to whittle away your time brushing the hair of your My Little Pony whilst bopping your head to Erasure (Ok, so this really is a minuscule percentage of the world’s population). You must play Robot Unicorn Attack by AdultSwim – http://games.adultswim.com/robot-unicorn-attack-twitchy-online-game.html It’s an 80’s adventure!

The game is refreshingly simple: It’s a scrolling 2d platformer, with just 2 buttons; Z makes you jump, X allows you to dash. That’s it. You control a lovely white robot unicorn, who must race her way towards an endless goal, armed only with steady legs and a magical rainbow mane. On the way, you must jump over holes in the classic gaming fashion – you can double jump by tapping Z twice – and avoid large glass stars that attempt to obstruct you. Dashing through these stars provides you with a score bonus which is multiplied for every one you destroy in a row. Your score is also increased as you manage to catch floating butterfly fairies as you sprint through the gameworld. The game is pure simplicity, and that is why it is so fun! You don’t even need two hands to play, leaving you a spare hand to eat, drink, or clench a fist in excitement!

The greatest triumph of this game has got to be the soundtrack. I really don’t think I’ve ever played a flashgame that hasn’t got a horrendously repetitive musical accompaniment, especially games that have only one song on an endless loop. But in this instance, it is so far from the case. Ok, so it’s Erasure; not something you’ll ever find on my ipod (although I seek to rectify this now…). But somehow, in some way, this song is perfect. Maybe it’s the unapologetically cheesy lyrics; maybe it’s the heavenly combination of unicorns, fairies and the enchanting vocals of Andy Bell. Whatever the reason, I love this song. And I’m not alone! Check out all the covers that can be found on Youtube… I swear Erasure should pay AdultSwim for the renewed interest in their music that this game has undoubtedly generated.

Somehow I managed to achieve a score of 33170, with one particular single run of 21,770 (the overal score is calculated through a combination of 3 runs, or ‘3 wishes’). I was particularly proud but have little idea of how this happened. I’m pretty sure I spaced out and let my fingers do the thinking. Strategy at it’s finest.

The game consists of 45% magic, 25% joy and 30% whimsy. Just give it a go. You won’t stop playing. You won’t stop smiling. Do ittttt.

No, I’m not gay.

  1. […] you have a weak stomach then it’s advisable to exit here for something a little more […]

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