Posts Tagged ‘Remake’

Adaptations of classic 2D platformers like Mario are seen more readily on the internet than awful pop ups about online casinos and penis enlargement. Yet, rarely do you see two completely separate franchises cross over: Stand up Mari0.

The keen eyed gamers amongst you may well have spotted the significant clue in the title of the game… Go on, take another peek, I’ll give you a second chance.

Got it? Not yet, well why not Chell out another guess…?

That’s right, the geniuses over at Stabyourself have given the loveable Italian sprite a bloody Portal gun! Just imagine the possibilities – it’d make finding those warp zones a doddle! Actually why imagine, see the trailer below:


As you can see, Mari0 is an inventive remake of the original Super Mario Bros, with an additional four player co-op, game mods, map packs, a level editor and entirely free DLC!

The game is available to download for PC, Mac, and Linux, so head on over and give a try!

Wow, Hollywood never ceases to amaze me. If you read my blog then chances are that you’ve seen me ranting pretty fervently about the impending Akira remake. It just gets worse though…

I’ve just seen a trailer on IGN for an upcoming action flick called Bad Ass, starring Danny Trejo and I am gobsmacked. Not in a good way.

Ok, so Trejo is clearly a BEAST, sporting some particularly admirable facial hair. Uber Mexican. But seemingly his new role is playing the part of a humble Youtube hero – not quite Machete (MA-CHET-AY). Has Hollywood really created a whole film based on a viral Youtube clip?!

See for yourself:


Now see the original Youtube clip:


What’s next Hollywood, Charlie Bit my finger starring Charlie Sheen? Although that is definitely a true story.

With horrific live action remakes like GI Joe: Rise of Cobra and the impending doom that is Akira, is there really any need for further destruction of our childhood heroes? Well, finally someone has made a positive adaptation and interestingly it’s fan-made!

With a budget of zero, Dermot Canterbury has successfully recreated the 80’s disco-style opening sequence to Ulysses 31. Somehow he has managed to make it MORE camp. Ulysses looks less like a hero from a childhood animated fantasy and more like a bad porno Bee Gee.
 

 
Nice use of tennis balls though! Props.

(Media courtesy of Fluffrick and Denofgeek)

I am gutted. So very, very gutted.

If you’ve been following my blog for a while you may have seen an early post about the plans for a shambolic Hollywood remake of anime classic, Akira. The biggest gripe I had was with the rumoured cast, which was solely made up of “renowned” Caucasian actors. Early whispers suggested that  ‘J to the T’ Justin Timberlake and powder-faced vamp-twat Robert Pattinson were forerunners for the leading roles.

It has now been revealed that Kristen Stewart, the bi-species loving heroine from Twilight (just Frankenstein for her to pull now and she’s done the horror threeway), is rumoured to have been offered the role of Kei, Kaneda’s lady friend. Is this going to be another bloody Twilight? Why not get that other pig-nosed bloke involved too and be done with it.

Also, since when was bestiality praised in cinema. You’re getting off with a wolf for Christ’s sake!

Time for a boycott me thinks.

Even Kristen felt sick to her stomach knowing she had been offered the role.

Often I may be commenting on games, films, music or books that are somewhat outdated but somehow I have managed to miss. Hence ‘From the Vaults’… Onward!

Developer: Chair Entertainment, Epic Games

Producer: Microsoft Game Studios

Platforms: Xbox Arcade (reviewed), PC

Price: 1200 points (purchased for 600 during sale)

As Muse so eloquently put it, “Our time is running out”, and boy they weren’t wrong! As the years roll by it seems harder and harder to devote any real time to gaming. Jobs, relationships, doing your own washing, it all ensures that daily there is less and less time to sit down and session one of your favourite games. I remember fondly the days of my youth, sessioning Ocarina of Time after I returned home from school, not a care in the world. Now you’re lucky to squeeze in a few hours after a long day at work, and that’s if you find the energy from somewhere to avoid monging out in front of Dave. What was it Peter Parker used to say? ‘With great age comes great responsibility’, or something like that….

Beyond the diminishing time frame that increases as each year rolls by, the gaming industry itself continually makes it harder to divide your time. Games are released in increasing number, with bounding rapidity on multiple formats. Think about it, how many top quality titles have there been released within the last month and continuing into the next few? Fifa 12, Battlefield 3, Arkham Asylum, Modern Warfare 3. And that’s on top of all the games you have undoubtedly mounted up on your shelves, unfinished or even unopened! As games get more and more replayable, attempting to collect all those bloody achievements or trophies, with the ever-increasing amount of DLC and the days spent levelling up with online multiplayer, is it any wonder that many people immediately avoid the prospect of purchasing arcade or indie titles. There’s just not enough hours in the day!

However, conversely, an unavoidably strict daily schedule is the very reason why arcade titles catch my eye. Despite my fervent desire to complete the single player campaigns of all the games I own, often I find myself struggling to immerse myself in a full title. Instead, it’s much easier to get involved with a game you know is going to have much smaller scope and therefore less play time. This, accompanied by a half-price sale offer, made it impossible not to add an additional game to my collection. In this instance, Epic Games Shadow Complex.

We all know that Epic are predominantly known for their renowned third-person sci-fi shooter series (say that three times in quick succession!), Gears of War. Epic by name, epic by nature. Clearly, they have set themselves an impressive precedent, but can they live up to this with their ongoing releases? Let’s explore….

Jason...... Bourne perhaps?

Importantly, Shadow Complex is entirely different to their Gears of War trilogy. It’s a 2D shooter (well seemingly) in which you play a single character, Jason, who’s primary objective is to rescue his female companion Claire. One day whilst travelling along some kind of nature walk, Claire stumbles upon a hidden subterranean base…. as you do. She is subsequently captured as a spy and imprisoned deep within the base’s walls. That’ll teach her for not using a Natural Trust walkway; textbook error! As the eponymous male hero, your job is of course to locate and rescue the clumsy damsel in distress, not easy with a smorgasbord of minions seeking out new intruder (that’s you!) Yet, soon your mission takes on a much more global significance as Claire’s captors are discovered to be hatching a plan to invade San Francisco. Roll up Jason, the classic hero archetype with a classic hero name (Argonauts/Power Rangers) as he somewhat frivolously decides to take on the whole operation. What a guy, what a guy.

Foam bridge it up!

Despite the game’s name, the plot really is that simple. It is never really explored much beyond this fairly superficial level which, arguably, is a constraint of the game being an arcade title. Alternatively though, when you look at Gears it can be observed that narrative complexity is not really Epic’s forte. The plot is certainly secondary to the gameplay in Gears of War, which is clearly mirrored in Shadow Complex. In this case though it does not appear to leave any lasting damage. The game is so detailed and there is so much to remember in the way of back-tracking that it is beneficial to coast through a very straightforward plot, but more on this later.

The introduction to Shadow Complex is very successful. Where many games supply you solely with an opening FMV explaining what kinda shit is going down (bear in mind this does happen after the introduction here though), SC provides the gamer with a minute-long playable section. Suddenly, the game casts you into the deep-end with no real explanation of the control system or your abilities, leaving you to fend for yourself by spamming away optimistically. Although brief, the player is given a moreish insight into the potential of the games combat system and its interesting 3D perspective.

A note on this; although the game is predominantly a 2D scrolling shooter (there are a few sections where the use of a turret gun enables a first-person perspective), it is accompanied by an impressive 3D background. This interesting perspective initially seems a little odd, perhaps as a result of it feeling a little out of the ordinary. This soon subsides though as the user witnesses how successfully it functions. The background is interactive, with enemies located on multiple planes of vision creating a variety of combative action. The game automatically changes your line of fire so that you are able to effectively shoot enemies in both the back and foreground. These changes are executed timely and accurately, key for maintaining the fluidity of the game.

Fuck, shit, arse, crap. Sorry, I've got turrets.

In essence, the gameplay is extremely similar to the original 2D Metroid series. The protagonist must navigate a vast 2D world, destroying waves of enemies they encounter in each area whilst seeking their updated objectives. Like Metroid, the game is separated into very distinct sections, separated by sporadic save points strategically placed around the map. Initially you begin with a limited armoury and moves list, essentially just jumping, climbing, shooting and melee (allowing for a stealth strategy to be deployed as with many shooters on the market these days… or you can just shoot the shit out of everything in sight!) This simple core gameplay deepens as you progress, obtaining new weapons and abilities that increase the creative potential of combat and exploration; a particular favourite is the Foam Gun, try attaching a grenade to it! Further Metroid influence can be seen in the very deliberate back-tracking element to the game, forcing the player to re-examine areas previously explored with their new weapons or abilities to progress with the main story or to locate the many hidden items dotted around the map. Particular areas are inaccessible until you locate alternative weapons – shining your torch on blockades reveals a specific colour that can be destroyed with varying projectiles (much like Metroid), for example, red sections require missiles – ensuring that game progression is somewhat linear whilst allowing for significant personal exploration.

For this back-tracking element to function effectively it is vital that the game has a detailed but clear map, which it does and is undoubtedly inspired by Metroid. See for yourself:

Shadow Complex - Metroid: Notice much difference? No.

Now, although the map looks vast, perhaps scaring you a little about the explorative element, it also offers some vital help with back-tracking. Doors that require particular unlocks to open them are marked in their specific colours on the map. However, there are numerous vents and windows that can be accessed which are not marked, so better get that memory working! Where’s Dr Kawashima when you need him? Additionally, all hidden items are marked on the map as a question mark whenever the user enters the room in which they are located. This ensures that items are rarely missed, providing a useful guide for all you completionists out there. Although this sounds like it’s too much support, almost cheating, your memory and spatial awareness are still very much engaged as many items are only accessible later in the game, requiring you to remember which ones need which ability, and in what very specific ways.

For a thorough review, it is important to mention replayability, which this game certainly has. With achievements demanding at least a second playthrough, back-tracking to collect every item and three sets of challenge packs, you will certainly play Shadow Complex beyond that initial run. The latter are interesting hologram-style challenges which will aid in you in learning particular techniques that will prove to be vital in your quest; with rankings that can be compared on Live with friends and globally there are competitive layers to this gaming onion.

Melee attacks are usual for keeping covert.

The only criticism I have found of Shadow Complex, and perhaps it’s one that many people would find particularly damaging, is that it is too similar to Metroid to be a simple homage, or influenced by it. With a map that absolutely resembles that of the classic Nintendo title and very similar gameplay and game progression, especially in the method of gaining access to doors, you cannot help but feel that it is somewhat a rip-off. But fuck it, I LOVE METROID! Ok, so it is disappointingly unoriginal. Worse still, there is no way that the developers could have ever got away without the comparison being made and I’m sure they were fully aware of that fact but happily ignored it.  There is such a fine line between being influenced by something and completely stealing the idea, and unfortunately Shadow Complex appears to fall in the second camp. However, it must be said that the inventive change of perspective effectively enhances the gameplay of this title, creating a vital distance between the two franchises. Despite the seemingly shameless gaming theft, Shadow Complex is a bug-free pleasure to play from start to finish and one not to be missed.

So what have we learnt? Despite the torrent of full-release titles due for release towards the end of this year, arcade games cannot and must not be avoided. Sure there is almost certainly a whole heap of awful arcade and indie titles out there, but make sure that you do your research first!

Oh and don’t hike anywhere that isn’t registered by the Natural Trust, you never know who you might meet.

First of all, to avoid any confusion, this post does not relate to my blogging absence and subsequent return. I would never refer to myself as ‘King’. However, if you would like to do so I shall only blush horribly like a typical suede-headed Irishman and smile contently.

Actually this post refers to the return of animated royalty, the Disney wonder that is The Lion King. Insert generic 90’s childhood whoop of nostalgia here >

Why does this exist? Talk about polishing a turd....

Now, I’ve sat through my fair share of 3D films looking like Buddy Holly’s special brother, and on the whole I have been thoroughly disappointed (an honourable mention must go out to Avatar though). Some of the worst offenders are JackAss 3-D, Spy Kids 3-D and Step Up 3-D. Notice any similarities here? Each of these films complete a trilogy whilst including needless and almost entirely redundant 3D visuals (ok I admit, a flying slo-mo dildo hitting Rock Kosick’s face isn’t something you get to see everyday). Is it possible that the film makers behind these sequels decided to include 3D purely because they are the third films in a series, providing them with a convenient ‘3’ already lodged in the title?! Surely this is not a coincidence…

Clearly 3D is trending in the movie world, and disparagingly this can only ever lead to a market that will soon become horribly saturated with piss-poor quality releases as directors jump on the proverbial bandwagon. After all, there are plenty o’ precedents. Take comic book adaptations. A few years back this all seemed to originate (obviously excluding sporadic adaptations from the past like the original Batman or Superman movies) with the creation of Sam Raimi’s Spiderman, what was at its best a mediocre modern take on a classic comic, praised more for its cast selection than its faithfulness to the original medium.

Homer - Duncan - Bruce

What followed was a torrent of similar titles… Spiderman 2 and 3, X-Men 1, X2, X-Men: The Last Stand, X Men Origins: Wolverine, X-Men: First Class, Ironman 1 and 2, Batman Begins, The Dark Knight, The Punisher, Catwoman, Hulk, Daredevil, Elektra, Hellboy, Sin City, Watchmen, Alien vs Predator, Scott Pilgrim vs the World, Silver Surfer, V for Vendetta, Transformers, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, Transformers: Dark of the Moon… and the flood continues with planned 2012 releases of The Avengers and the completion of Christopher Nolan’s Batman trilogy with The Dark Knight Rises. A worryingly similar process can be seen with the release of CG films, with 2006 and 2008 particularly prolific but offensive years, (check a detailed list here – How many films can you pick from this list that you would classify as masterpieces, or even watchable?), and the absolutely needless, sacrilegious modern sequels to seemingly already completed trilogies, for example, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and Live Free or Die Hard, both with worryingly aging protagonists.

Inescapably, 3D is here to stay! This in itself is not an issue if we can avoid all the pap that will inevitably squeeze out of Hollywood’s backside in the next few years. I am all for digital progression and welcome our 3D interactive future, but cannot help but fearing what’s next, especially when the word ‘remake’ is thrown into the mix. This word is perhaps the most fear-inducing of all when used in reference to cinema and unfortunately it’s currently used more often than Channel Dave shows Jeremy Clarkson’s moody, pubey-headed face. With 80’s classic Footloose having just been remade into ANOTHER modern street dance film, we must sit and wait anxiously for possible upcoming remakes of Robocop, Judge Dredd, The Crow and Total Recall. So, when someone combines both a remake of an old classic with 3D visuals one can only dread what evil spawn is to be produced.

BUT! THE LION KING 3D IS AWESOMES!! Phewww. I must say, I was a little worried when I first heard about the prospect of a Lion King remake. My primary concern was what could be gained from it (apart from a substantial amount on money in Walt the younger’s back pocket). What could be achieved by re-releasing this film in 3D? Is anything going to be enhanced by updating the visuals, especially when the original animation was so ground-breaking anyway? Are they going to achieve anything but ruining perhaps one of the most well-loved Disney animations?

Imagine this scene in 3D! Wait, it exists?!

Boy was I wrong! In terms of film selection it could not be better. I cannot think of a single Disney film that would be better suited to 3D (needless to say, a 3D King Louis shaking his hairy monkey arse would bring immeasurable joy) which provided me with noticeable excitement as I entered the darkened cinema. Thinking back to the original film you can immediately envision particularly suitable sections for a 3D update, like the heart-wrenching stampede scene or the beautifully vibrant Simba/Nala escape from Zazu to ‘I just Can’t Wait to be King’. Beyond the obvious though, they have done a fantastic job in taking the original and thoroughly realising it in a 3D world. Where many films fail, The Lion King masterfully rides triumphant, on an ostrich. Often 3D is implemented on such a small scale, on so few and insignificant sections of a film, with such poor post production that it brings nothing to the final release. TLK (cause I’m street like that) includes very affecting 3D elements throughout the film, often providing the audience with a real depth of landscape beyond that which was possible in the original film. Furthermore, it absolutely enhances the energy and movement of the varying species, especially during the opening musical numbers. Pride Rock has never looked so utopian! With nothing of the original being edited, the fantastic cast, songs, narrative and charaterisation remain with a heightened visual impact improving your perfect memories.

D'awwww.

Whilst watching the film I also realised how amazing a voice cast it had (Atkinson, Broderick, Goldberg [NOT the wrestler], Jeremy’s Iron [for you Simpsons fans] and the second oldest son from Home Improvement), something I could not appreciate when I first watched it as my youthful 8 year old self.

My only fear is that now Disney will re-release their entire back-catalogue in 3D…. But until that point you have to go and see it! Your inner child will melt at the magic!

OR: I could have just said  ‘I ❤ Timon’. Either or…

As a regular gamer, how often do you find yourself disillusioned with the industry, jaded by the torrent of remakes that all shatter the beautifully-crafted originals?

Unfortunately, this happens far too often, to the detriment of many a gaming franchise. For reference, examine Starfox, damaged irrevocably by the less-than-impressive third-person manifestation on the Gamecube, Conflict Denied Ops which absolutely crippled the Conflict franchise by transforming it into a FPS, or the hotly debated Sonic Adventure on the Dreamcast. Maybe I’m being a little harsh, and at very least I respect the decision to move forward, experimenting with a title in an attempt to enhance it rather than let it stagnate – it’s just a shame when it horribly fails. Thankfully, there are some titles that are able to update and create incredible sequels. Fine examples of this can be seen in both the Legend of Zelda and Metroid franchises, taking simple 2D classics and rendering them in 3D with new worlds, enemies and narratives. The latter is what I shall focus on within this post…

Glorious nostalgia

With various adaptations in the series, some less well-received than others (Metroid – the Other M, mentioning no names), it is no surprise that fans have turned to their own ingenuity to create fresh sequels. And my God, have they been working hard! Check them all out here: http://www.metroid-database.com/fanapps.php

The most recent creation is a glorious tribute to retro 2D gaming, harking back to Metroid’s finest format. Minitroid, so far just a tech demo, has been put together by a three person team: Construct Programmer Tokinsom, an artist Betatronic, and music composer Jamie Billings. They’ve been working on it for about a year, uploading updates via Tokinsom’s youtube account, but it’s no surprise that the game is still only in demo form when you see how comprehensive it is! The game takes everything that was right about Metroid – the simple side-scrolling shooting system, the expansive 2D environments, the in-depth exploration and strategy application – and throws in a new protagonist, a mini, chibi-style Metroid. Despite wearing the classic orange spacesuit, she is almost cute!

Mind the gap!

At its core, Minitroid is classic Metroid gameplay, with all the familiar commands and power-ups. Moves are limited to ducking, jumping (with a double jump) and shooting (including a charge shot with your default weapon, and added missiles), with additional moves unlocked as you discover new ups (the Speedcore, allowing Minitroid to dash also enables her to long jump). And don’t forget the Morph Ball and Bombs! Enemies are varied, requiring alternating tactics in order to kill them efficiently, as is the gameworld, a mass of adjoining levels formed from many different colours and textures. For a game so simple in design, it is remarkably detailed. Adding to the classic feel is Billings’ beautiful chiptune soundtrack, transporting you right back to your gaming childhood. It’s highly reminiscent of the original game music, creating an audible sense of fantasy and sci-fi to complete the sublime environments that surround you.

Open Sesame!

The game has a good learning curve, essential for enjoyable but rewarding gameplay. Enemies are fairly easy to combat, especially when you’ve discovered their path of movement and attack, and they often drop missile and health refills. Save points are located throughout the game, at challenging intervals – you’re very grateful when you find them, but won’t have to work too hard in order to do so. The greatest difficulty isn’t survival, it’s working out how in God’s name you progress from one area to another, but with a little time you’ll manage it! (And if you can’t, unlucky because there are no walkthroughs!)

Minitroid is the perfect combination of shoot-em-up action and puzzle/strategy; you must use initiative to uncover new areas, whilst experimenting with the power-ups you’ve earned in inventive ways to progress. Despite being only a demo, the game is solid and detailed, and well deserves a few hours of your time. Show your support for a growing indie game industry and check it out!

I recently posted about Robot Unicorn Attack, suggesting that it is quite possibly the best game ever. That no longer stands –

Wowwww. If only this was real!!

The song lends itself so well to chiptuning! Objectives, like finding your cereal bowl, are challenging and engrossing, with B-rate Usher making an epic final boss! Sadly though, the game would only last 4 minutes and there is no way in hell you would play it more then once…

But who knows, there’s always the chance that she’ll release another song?

Charles Caleb Colton once said, “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery”. He obviously never had his favourite anime completely bastardised.

It was reported today that Warner and Legendary Pictures have sent scripts to various Hollywood actors in the hope of securing two protagonists for their impending remake of the classic anime Akira. This in itself is not cataclysmic news, but wait until you hear who are the front runners…

Initially I was entirely apprehensive about the idea of an Akira remake. The film is far too established a cult classic. It’s like remaking Battleship Potempkin; all the style, all the emotion, all the original charm is at risk of being lost, superseded by the modern taste for beautiful but hollow computer-generated visuals. Style crucifying substance. This is especially treacherous with the transformation of a sublimely animated film to live-action. The dangers are numerous: Will the pace and energy of the action-packed narrative mirror what is possible in animation? Will the cast even vaguely resemble the characters we know and love, in both appearance and personality? Quite plainly, how can one replicate the delicate and astounding visual world created by Katsuhiro Otomo?

Slowly, I am coming round. After all, life is about progress, moving forwards, not hankering for the past. It’s just a shame that directors so often look backwards, rather than searching for a new story to be told. We need to unearth the new Akira, not taint what has been made perfect, evolving it into some hideous mutation. I am at very least intrigued by the possibilities. Perhaps, for once, Hollywood can create something fresh and beautiful, something we can all be proud off. And either way, whether it’s a glorious triumph or a horrendous flop, it’ll provide me with some valuable material to discuss.

…This was my feeling until about 1pm today when I heard the update announcing the ‘considered’ actors.

Are you f***ing kidding me?

OMFGWTF. This is both the first and last time I shall do that.

None of these actors are suitable in the least! Forget the fact the Akira tells the story of a bike gang comprising rowdy 14 year old, Japanese school kids… actually, don’t forget that, that’s insane! How in God’s name is James McAvoy or Chris Pine meant to imitate that?? Biology is their greatest bloody enemy. I can just see it now, Chris Pine acting out Tetsuo’s dream sequence with all the gusto and, ahem, emotion he displayed in Unstoppable. Awesome. Not one of those named actors should have even been considered, but Robert ‘R Patzzz’ Patterson and Justin ‘Forget I was ever in Nsync’ Timberlake are particularly offensive. I’m not here to slate them as actors – JT was praised highly for his portrayal of Napster co-founder Sean Parker in The Social Network, and RP, well, erm, he has lovely eyebrows. The biggest issue I have with these two candidates is their notoriety. With actors so globally recognised it’s going to be difficult to overlook their status as they attempt to convince you of their authenticity of character. But this is precisely why they have been shortlisted: draw in the audiences with some big names, regardless of their suitability or the potential damage to the franchise. Such a decision doesn’t bode well for the quality of the film…

If either of these stars are selected it is sure to be a failure. What a Revelation, in the biblical, fire and brimstone, we’re all fucked, sense.

Originally written in April 12th 2010, for a gaming content writer competition

When it was announced that the N64 classic Perfect Dark was coming to Xbox Live Arcade, frequent demands were heard across the gaming community for the release of its predecessor, the nostalgia-filling Brosnan-Basher Goldeneye. However, it soon became very clear that Rare made the right decision.

Despite PD drawing very heavily from Goldeneye, it is patently a much more developed title. Graphically it was much sharper, with a greater attention to detail and palette of colours used, especially visible in some of the darker levels like Chicago Stealth, looking especially beautiful when rendered in full HD.

See the difference for yourself!

PD also had more sophisticated gameplay and importantly much more replay value, lending itself perfectly to XBLA. Not only is there an entertaining solo campaign – a captivating sci-fi story, free from the chains of cinematic realism – but a vast multiplayer system also. This includes standard co-op mode and a highly inventive ‘counter-op’ scenario in which one player assumes the role of enemy forces, constantly respawning as a different enemy attempting to foil Joanna Dark’s objectives.  Additionally, there are crowns to collect by completing a specific task in each level and 29 challenges to conquer, which can be played solo or multiplayer, pitting the players against AI simulants in various scenarios like the classic capture the flag (briefcase) or king of the hill.

Greasy Monsieur Brosnan

Obviously when compared to a successful contemporary FPS like MW2 the AI often appears illogical and outdated. However, this is completely forgivable when accepting  that PD was originally released 10 long years ago, coupled with the incredibly thorough multiplayer simulant AI list. The list is perhaps one of the most creative and memorable elements of the game, including 18 massively differing sim types, from standard difficulty alternatives to specialised bots that prey on the winning player or that will only attack using explosives.

All this, bundled up for a measly 1200 points? And never having to look at Mr Brosnan’s greasy mirkin hair? Yes please.